Madita is rainbow mom. What that means exactly, what such an everyday life looks like and which questions are relevant around it, she discusses in her own podcast “Gay Mom Talking”.
Be proud and loud and love each other! Love makes family!
Dear Madita, what’s the deal with the podcast, how did you come to create such a format and when was that?
My podcast Gay Mom Talking is a queer family podcast that talks about family life, challenges, and opportunities for queer people. As I myself am a mom in a rainbow family, it has always been a matter of concern to me to educate people about our family form and to break down fears of contact. I got into podcasting in 2019 when I made the top 10 in a Spotify talent contest and got to present my Gay Mom Talking podcast concept to a panel of judges in Berlin. Unfortunately, I didn’t win the competition back then, but I did gain a lot of valuable experience. Two months after my Berlin trip to Spotify, the first episode of Gay Mom Talking went online.
What are your most important topics that you discuss there?
When it comes to choosing topics, I try to mix things up. I report on queer children’s books, but also on the unfulfilled desire to have children, surrogacy and trans* children. It has always been important to me not only to show the rosy side of queer family life, but also to show clearly with my guests that queers are often not considered in the area of family and are even discriminated against – socially and politically.
What is the response of the listeners?
It’s important to me that my listeners don’t just come from the queer bubble. Sure, most of the people in my community are queer themselves and are happy to see me address issues that move them. But I also regularly get great messages from listeners who tell me that they heard about rainbow families and their challenges for the first time through the podcast. This shows me how important it is to create visibility and audibility for LGBTIQ+.
When I started my podcast in 2019, I was prepared to receive a lot of hate mail or criticism. But that did not happen. I get invited into queer and non-queer formats to talk about rainbow families and receive heartwarming messages of thanks from listeners who have found the courage to start a family themselves through the podcast. I could cry with joy every time!
Who exactly are your listeners?
Rainbow families and those who eventually want to be. And generally people who are interested in Parenting.
What was a personal highlight for you?
Phew … there are many. The other day I was standing between Laura Wontorra (in a jogging suit) and Riccardo Simonetti (in a glitter suit) at a booking. That was already crazy!
What exactly is a rainbow family and do you like the term?
In a rainbow family, at least one parent defines themselves as LGBTIQ+. In my family, both mothers define themselves as lesbians.
I like the term myself. It radiates pride, happiness and diversity for me. It is also nice for my children to say that they live in a rainbow family. Rainbows are as popular as unicorns! Still, not everyone in the community can identify with the rainbow. I also often use “queer family” as a synonym.
What hurdles do rainbow families face in everyday life, whether socially or even legally?
At the moment, of course, it is (still) stepchild adoption that is putting obstacles in the way of many families. Hopefully when it’s abolished soon, I’ll buy Familyship a bottle of bubbly!
Otherwise, most families report that they do not feel taken seriously in the social environment. In my view, this is also due to the lack of visibility. Fortunately, a lot is developing in a good direction right now. It gets better!
Can you in good conscience recommend starting a rainbow family?
Yes! Yes! Yes! Best decision ever.
What basic framework do you think is needed for this?
At least one person who is willing and able to take responsibility for a child. That’s it!
Are there also pitfalls?
Sure, you shouldn’t stumble into a rainbow family naively. But that is not even possible. Queer parents in Spe should inform themselves in advance and decide for themselves which path they want to take to realize their desire to have a child. The possibilities are many and each holds different challenges.
Is there anything else you’d like to add?
Be proud and loud and love each other! Love makes family! And family is colorful.
Madita, thank you very much for the interview.